Memories
by Taloolah P
Summary: Carlisle and Laurent have a past. My version of their meeting at the house after the baseball game. Slash CxL rated M for Lemony goodness


**A/N: I've had the idea for this one-shot for a while and after searching for a good Carlisle / Laurent slash fic and being disappointed I decided to write it! I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or its characters. I own a dirty mind but that is all!**

CPoV

I can sense him getting closer. Any second now he will be standing in front of me again. The others are with Edward trying to protect Bella. It seems silly under the circumstances but I can't help feeling like my world is suddenly upside down. He is close now, I can tell. My family think I am here preparing for Bella's arrival and escape from James but I'm not.

When I saw him striding towards us, the shock hit me like a bolt of lightening, shocking me to my core. He had been the last vampire I had expected to see. If I'm honest, he'd been the last vampire I wanted to see too.

He is knocking at the door now and I can feel the tension within me building. The smell of him is bringing exquisite but painful memories flooding back. I head slowly towards the door trying to delay the inevitable confrontation that lies ahead. My fingers wrap themselves firmly around the door handle and I turn it slowly. I fix my face with a calm expression and open the door to my past.

"Hello Carlisle. I need to talk to you!" The smooth tones of his voice slither over me like caramel. I can't believe he is standing here in front of me so calmly after everything that has happened between us. I take a step back and motion to him to enter my home. He does so with an elegance that he has always possessed.

"I had a feeling that you would come Laurent!" My voice stays calm but inside I am battling a torrent of emotions that is trying desperately to flood forth. He steps past me and turns so that he is facing me. His red eyes bore into me with an intensity that I have missed. His dark lashes forming a perfect frame around those glowing eyes.

"I need to warn you about James. He is dangerous! Very dangerous, he will not give up until the human is his." His words remind me that there is business to discuss and I must not loose sight of the matter at hand. I push the storm of emotions within me to the back of my mind, ready to formulate a plan with any information that I am about to receive. "He is the best tracker that I have ever met. Even I am scared of him at times. He has obsessions and he will not be stopped."

"There must be a way that he can be stopped." I look searchingly at the tall figure in front of me. He knows James and his information can help to save Bella's life. "Please, I need you to tell me as much about him as you can."

I hold eye contact with Laurent as a thought formulates in my mind. Is Laurent loyal to James? Is his relationship more than just for hunting purposes? I think back and my thoughts seem ridiculous. Laurent is not evil, not like James. I mean, yes he kills humans but he has a good side. I've seen it before and I have no doubt that it still exists.

"Is there somewhere private that we can go to sit and talk?" I look around at the empty house and although it is private I will feel more comfortable carrying this discourse on in my office. I motion to Laurent to follow me and I head up the stairs to my office.

"We can talk in my office if you'd like." I point to the door in front of us and lean forward to open it. Laurent walks in as I open the door. "Please have a seat. I'm sure we have much to discuss." He sits down in the leather high back chair which faces my desk. I walk around to the other side and sit in my office chair facing him.

"I know that this must be difficult for you but as I said earlier, I wish to cause you no trouble. I am simply here to warn you of James and then I will be on my way. I do not wish to dredge up memories that you wish to forget. I did not know you lived in the area or I promise you I would have avoided it." His dark hair flows loosely around his face as he talks.

He doesn't want to dredge up old memories. Well it's too late for that. They are all fully awake and nagging at me. Those memories, they are painful yet beautiful. I can't ignore them but I'm not ready to deal with them yet. I sit and stare at his dark and strong exterior, knowing what lies beneath.

As I stare at him, I can't help but feel the urge to be close to him once more. To feel his skin next to mine, to feel his gentle caress but I know that it will not happen. I have changed since the old days and I have no intention of returning to that dark place within me.

"Consider us fully warned about James. You can rest assured that he will not stay alive long enough to harm Bella! My sons will not allow that to happen." I smile serenely at him and start to stand. He motions for me to sit and if it were anyone else I would have been filled with outrage but it isn't anyone else. It is him, the one who used to mean so much to me.

"Wait! Why can't we sit and talk like we used to? I know it is painful but do I have to go straight away? I am intrigued by your lifestyle now. So much has changed since I last saw you. You have changed! You seem content, something that I never thought I would see." His words reach out to my heart. They wrap themselves around it and tug at it as if trying to restart it.

I can't allow myself to be drawn in by his masculinity, not again. I will not let myself unleash the feelings that are threatening to burst through my chest. I want to tell him about my life but I can't do it. I'm not strong enough to keep my composure, not yet. "Yes I've changed Laurent but so have you." Those few words are all I feel able to say to him.

I long to tell him that I have missed him and that although I have changed, he will always hold a special place inside me. I can't tell him because although a part of me is still in love with him, a more dominant part of me can never forgive his betrayal. He hurt me and I will carry that hurt with me for eternity.

"Carlisle, you must know that I am sorry for the things that happened the last night we were together. I did not want to hurt you but I was weak." His eyes look sad. He lowers his head as if ashamed of his prior actions. In this moment, I see the weak and vulnerable person that I fell in love with. He is the same Laurent but somehow he has been tainted by our years apart.

"I have a life here now. I have a family, something that I had never dreamed of. I am almost whole again and I can't allow the fine balance to be altered. Your arrival is threatening to do just that and I'm sorry Laurent but I can't, I won't, allow it!" I look at him with an intensity that I have not expressed in years, no decades. My words hurt him, I can tell they do but I have to protect my children.

Esme knows about my past with Laurent. I could not hide it from her even though I wanted to. The rest of my family are unaware of my entire past. They know parts but not the whole truth. I have been careful to never even think of Laurent for fear that Edward would find out about him. I am still not ready for them to know yet and so I must send Laurent on his way. "You have to go now Laurent. Please go and do not come back here."

I stand up and walk around my desk ready to usher Laurent out of the door and out of my life. He stands and reaches his hand out to me. "I see that you are happy and I understand. It pains me to leave but I will have to for I fear if I stay then I will become a part of your future." We shake hands and his touch sends shivers tingling down my spine.

It is no good. The rush of emotions nearly knocks me backwards. The love and the lust come flying back and I am unable to let his hand leave mine. He knows what I am feeling and I am certain that he is feeling it too for he has made no attempt to remove his hand from mine.

I lean towards him and in a split second we are locked together in a kiss. A kiss filled with decades of lust that I thought would abate but I was wrong. Our separation has simply served to intensify our feelings. His tongue probes into my mouth as my lips allow it entry. I suck on his tongue and draw it further into my mouth. A groan escapes his throat and finds a home within my mouth. His hands have reached for my shoulders and his grip is firm yet gentle. The Laurent of my past smoulders in front of me and I can't help but feel complete again.

"Carlisle I have missed you and you can't deny that this feels right!" he pulls away from me as he speaks. He drags me towards him again and I feel his urgent lips on mine. I cannot stop myself as I wrap my arms around him and this time it is I who deepens the kiss. We are standing in my office wrapped around each other like two vines and it feels like we have never spent any time apart. It feels so right to be kissing him even though I know in my cold heart that it will never be right. I can't allow this to become anything more than it is. We can't see each other again after this. I have to think of my family and what is best for them.

As Laurent's arms snake around my waist I decide that there is no reason why I should not enjoy this moment. One moment of pleasure will not change my life. It will not ruin what I have with Esme. We are strong and she will understand but right now I need this. I need to feel again. I need to be with Laurent.

As he pulls me close I can feel his erection straining against my hip. My own arousal is mounting quickly and I know that he can feel it. He reaches his hand between us and rubs my cock through the fabric of my trousers. I let a moan escape my lips and it is immediately followed by a similar sound from Laurent.

I slide my hand down the front of his trousers and it quickly makes contact with his hard shaft. I wrap my fingers around it and start to rub back and forth. He moans again and the sound serves to increase my arousal. I kiss him again and again. I do not want to lose this physical contact sooner than I have to.

Laurent unbuttons my trousers and slides them to the floor. He releases my cock from my silk boxers and pushes me back towards the desk. I feel the smooth wood against my buttocks as he pushes me back further still. I am now pinned against my own desk and the thought of what is to come sends me into frenzy.

I reach up and grab Laurent, pulling him down on top of me. We are now almost spread across the entire length of my desk. Laurent is on top of me and our limbs are entwined. We kiss again and Laurent searches out my cock again. He grabs it firmly and begins to rub back and forth. The pleasure within me is building and I can feel it rippling through my entire body.

Laurent pushes himself up so that he is stood before me. He leans forward and takes my full length in his mouth. The sensation is amazing as he sucks and licks at my cock. I gasp and moan as I feel my orgasm getting closer. I reach out and pull his clothes from him so that I have better access to his hard cock.

He moans and the vibrations of his voice send a tingle of pleasure through my entire length. I reach with my hands and begin to rub him again. He moans again, sending more vibrations through me. I am sitting up now and I reach one hand to grab his head. I wind my fingers through his thick dark hair so I can hold him still while I thrust into his dark, sensual mouth.

I can feel my orgasm straining to explode within me as I fuck his mouth. I can't hold on any longer and I let out a guttural growl as I send thick jets of my creamy cum shooting down his throat. He sucks and swallows all that I have for him. I lay back on my desk until my senses recover.

"That was amazing!" I smile up at him and catch a full view of his still hard cock. "You really must let me return the favour!" I stand up and turn Laurent around so that it is he who is leaning on the desk. He happily lays back and lets me pleasure him.

I take his cock in my mouth and slowly slide my lips down towards the base. I pause for a moment and flip my tongue up to circle around the head causing him to twitch and wriggle with pleasure. He moans and begins to thrust into my mouth. He is close to orgasm and I know it won't take much to send him over the edge. I slide my mouth back and forth over his shaft, keeping a constant pressure that has him moaning loudly. He thrusts into my mouth harder and quicker. His moans are filling my office and I know he is about to cum.

One more thrust is all it takes as he grabs my head on either side and fills my mouth with his cum. I gulp it down eagerly and suck until there is no more. He pulls out of my mouth and looks at me with lust filled eyes.

"That was amazing, as always. Are you sure that you will not change your mind about us?"

I can't believe he is asking me this. I thought I made my feelings clear. "I am very sorry Laurent but my future is one of stability. I have that here and I am not prepared to cause pain to my family or to jeopardise their happiness through carelessness on my part. As much as I have feelings for you, I am unable to ever act upon them again."

"Very well, I will be going now." We both dress in silence. "Carlisle please remember that although I have hurt you, my actions also hurt me. I will never forgive myself for what happened between us but I will also never stop you from moving on." He leans in and places a kiss on my forehead tenderly. "You were my first true love and I will never forget you!" With those words he moves to the door.

I grab him and pull him in for one last kiss before losing him for another eternity. As we pull away from each other I hear the others nearing the house. Laurent hears it too and looks worried.

"Do not fear them Laurent. I will make it clear to them that you are no longer on James' side. You will not be harmed!"

We head down the stairs, reaching the bottom just as Edward and Bella burst through the door.

**A/N: I hope you did enjoy this. Whilst writing it I was thinking about a prequel to elaborate on the life that Carlisle and Laurent shared. If you have any thoughts on that then please let me know.**

**I have two big favours to ask: one – please review, two – if you liked this story then please recommend it to all your friends because I really want to get as many people to read it as possible. It would make me so happy. ****Thank you! Taloolah xx**


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